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the losers
The Losers
Reviewer: Kyle Retter
Director: Sylvain White
Cast: Jeffery Dean Morgan, Zoe Saldana, Chris Evans, Idris Elba, Columbus Short, Jason Patric, Oscar Jaenada, Holt McCallany

Another week, another comic book-turned action movie showdown. Kick-Ass caught me off guard last week with its smart genre bending story and the tenacity with which it delivered its satire. I knew I was taking it down a notch for a PG-13 flick, so it was a little adjustment, but I settled in nicely.

“The Losers” are a Special Forces unit, created by DC Comics in the late 60’s, who are betrayed and left for dead. We join them as fugitives stuck in Bolivia... or Costa Rica... or some place like that. They gotta get the bad guy, but to do that - they gotta get that thing, to get that money, so they can save the world... or something like that.

The Losers, as you should infer, is all about “the losers”; Clay, Roque, Pooch, Cougar, and Jake. They've had a long 3rd world-drug-lord-taking-down history together. They're the quintessential group of military buddies. Either you’re into that kind of thing, or you’re not.

This thought prompted me to establish a list of criteria that you must commit to if you want to enjoy this movie.

#1. You must love ensemble buddy movies.#2. You must not hold the one-liners against any of said Losers… “Pay back is a bitch”.#3. You must enjoy cheap set-ups and pay-offs.#4. You must not get mad at being able to predict just about everything that happens- Scene for scene, line for line.#5. You must LOVE the villain - a.k.a. the best character in the movie.

Commit to all 5 of these agreements and you'll walk out ofThe Losers happy to be alive.

Don't get me wrong.
If there is a sequel, which there will be, I will not see it.
If someone asks me if they should see this movie, I will not necessarily umm, "recommend" it.
But, The Losers is a harmless movie. It’s not claiming to be anything it isn't and I can respect that. A "B-movie" passing as an "A". A choose your own adventure book without the choice.

Don't stop believing.

My Vote: If you have a pre-teen nephew or son or little brother, you’d be the coolest if you took him to see The Losers.